Repairs: A Happy Couples Secret Weapon
What often distinguishes happy from distressed couples is not how well they communicate but their ability to contain conflict when it starts to escalate. The term "repair attempt" according to Gottman in his book (7 Principles for Making Marriage Work p.27) refers to any statement or action--silly or otherwise--that prevents negativity from escalating out of control. The ability to make successful repairs is crucial for satisfaction and stability in the relationship. What most determines whether a repair attempt will be accepted is the strength of the couples friendship.
The success or failure of a couples repair attempts is one of the primary factors in whether their marriage is likely to flourish or flounder. “A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.”
Proverbs 19:11 NIV .